I’m having one today.
For some reason, the thought of doing any work on The Novel has no appeal to me today, and I have no idea why. I’ve written about this in the past, but this isn’t procrastination. It isn’t fear. It isn’t the need for a day off. I just don’t feel like writing today. Even making an entry in The Journal was a struggle, and I have no commitments to length or content for that. The only commitment I have for it is to write in it every day. I did do it, but it was almost physically painful.
And The Novel is even worse. There is a knot in my stomach the size of a canned ham just thinking about it, even though I have a very good idea of where I’m currently going in the story.
What to do, what to do.
I know I will go home tonight and sit in front of the computer with a frosty-cool beverage close at hand. I will make every effort to avoid distraction, but I’m not sure that I will be able to reach that lofty, Joyce-ian goal of getting a dozen words on the page, much less the 1500-ish I can normally put down.
This is going to be a fight between Intent and Action against something I am unable to even define. We’ll see how it goes.
PS – I’ll edit this and let you know how it went, and what I did, if anything, to get past this. If I can identify what the problem itself is, I’ll let you know that, too.
PPS – As promised, here is how things went this evening:
Could have been better, but it could have been much worse. I ended up just sitting in front of the computer, beverage at hand, and read the last page or so I had written the night before. A little more sitting, a little beverage, and something came to me. I typed that, then sat some more. Something else came to me, so I typed that in, too.
After an hour and half, I had just a hair over 1,000 added. Not an epic session, but it was something. The proof is there in the pudding – if you sit in the chair, something might come. If I had given in to my desire to NOT write, I would have done nothing at all.
Four out of five dentists surveyed acknowledge that being in the chair makes it easier to get things done.
PPPS – I’m still not sure what caused that overwhelming feeling of ‘nope’ to hit me today. I do know that an appropriate beverage of a frosty-cool nature didn’t hurt one bit.