I missed a day writing yesterday. Nothing on The Novel. No work on The Script (still waiting on the feedback from Trusted Friend #2, so I’m not tripping on that). No blog post (I’m trying to establish a M-W-F posting schedule for it). I don’t think I put any notes down for The Novel, even. Nothing about plot points, character ideas/details. Not even a note about what Book #63 in the series might be about. Nothing, other than a few hundred stream of consciousness type words in The Journal.
How does that make me feel?
How should I feel?
I do have negative feelings about missing a day. My daily word count to reach the goal of a 100k words by mid-May has increased by a little more than a 100 words/day. There is some guilt about not doing any ‘real’ writing yesterday. I’m not looking forward to making up the difference over the next couple of weeks.
Should I feel that way? I’m not sure. At all. The goal I’ve set is arbitrary. It’s for me and me alone. The world won’t come to an end. Dogs and cats won’t start living together. Nothing bad will come of it that matters, at least to anyone but me.
But I didn’t write for score yesterday. I don’t like that. Just the existence of that statement rankles me personally. If I’m going to write, I need to write. Otherwise, I’m just another one of those ‘writers’ that talk about their book, screenplay, or play without actually doing anything about it.
Professional pride, even though I’m not a professional, is thing eating at me. An opportunity lost to paint a page with glittering prose, to cover it with the happy accidents every writer makes when discovering a story. THAT is the thing I’m beating myself up with.
How to deal with it?
Sit your ass down in the chair. Pick up the pen or turn on the computer, and write. For good or bad, write. Having 100,000 words of illiterate, disjointed, trite crap puts you a step ahead, a step further to your goal, whatever that might be.
We need to remember that a bad day writing anything is better than a good day writing nothing at all.
Today starts right now. I’m going to write something. Maybe it will be good. Maybe it won’t. But I won’t find out until I try.
I’m going to try. And that is a victory in and of itself.